COLE TUCKER SUCCUMBS TO AIDS

Cole Tucker a gay-porn actor died earlier this month from "AIDS related illness" at the age of 61 according to the website Queerty.

This may not be "need to know" news for many however in this day and age when young gay men are still performing unprotected sex and there is still a culture of "bug chasers" Tucker's passing deserves more than a footnote on some gay-porn blog.

There is still no magic bullet and ask those who now may live longer than those decades ago if they had the option of being disease free or have to live a life of taking meds to delay the inevitable which they would chose.

It's still important to put a face on AIDS all these years after it began regardless how the person became infected.

If You're Celibate You Can Donate

Two years ago when I had my second operation to repair my severely damaged hip due to a car accident not only did the surgery go unexpectedly long but I loss a considerable amount of blood.

That afternoon/night back in my room I was given two units of blood.

Not once did I think or worry about the blood what with the testing for a variety of things including HIV.

In the US gay men are still barred from donating blood.

But Canada has just lifted its ban but with a catch.

You need to have not had sex with another man for five years.

Now how they will enforce this rule is beyond me.

Will Big Brother now monitor gays through all seeing eyes and keep tabs on their sex lives ?

And what about women ?

They can contract AIDS/HIV as easily as men can but no one talks about banning them from donating blood.

Gay and bisexual men continue to be the scapegoats in polluting the much needed donated blood supply.

As I wrote I didn't give it a thought when I needed the blood, nor would I have if gay and bisexual men were allowed to donate. Obviously I needed the blood .... end of conversation.

Tom Judson Lives His Life With AIDS

Tom Judson, actor, composer, musician and author has written a post at HuffPost Gay Voices describing his living with, rather than dying from AIDS twenty years after getting "that" call from his doctor.

The gay plague is not the death sentence it was so many years ago but with that being said there is still no cure nor prevention other than abstinence or taking sexual activity precautions.

Judson wrote his book Laid Bare which was published in 2011 based on his life experience as an legitimate actor, musician and yes of course his days as gay porn star Gus Mattox.

The HPGV writing gives one man's perspective who unfortunately far too many gay and bi men can relate to with honesty and thankfulness.

As he concludes in his essay, Sadly, I lost Bruce and most of my friends. I even outlived the World Trade Center. And much to my surprise, I was around to celebrate as the 20th century slipped into history. But I'd have to say that of all the milestones I've passed since that shocking morning two decades ago, the thing that pleases me most is that I lived to see Cats close.

Koch Died As He Lived In The Closet

Mayor Ed Koch was much like Howard Cosell.

You either loved him or hated him.

Today while many in New York City and politics celebrate the man, there are many in the LGBT blogging world who find fault with the fact that Koch lived a lie by not coming out as gay.

Koch was of a different generation than those today who for various reasons are able to come out now at a time when it has become more acceptable for announcing one's sexuality and declared identity.

I have less care to be frank and honest about whether Koch stayed in the closet than things brought up at the blog the Petrelis Files (from where this writer obtained the photo in this posting) about Koch and what he didn't do during the AIDS epidemic which many of my generation lived through, watched or knew folks who died and the denial by a standing President, Ronald Reagan, and politicos such as Koch who did little during the gay plague much less acknowledged.

During the years when he could have done so much to prevent the then-burgeoning AIDS problem into a full-bore epidemic, he choose to do so little in order not to be lumped in with the gay men who were the majority of people contracting HTLV-111, later known as HIV, Micheael Petrelis wrote.

As Petrelis noted outspoken AIDS activist and playwright Larry Kramer wrote in 2012, We must never forget that this man was an active participant in helping us to die, in murdering us,”.

It is a fair thing to say in this writer's opinion that Ed Koch died with the blood of many gay and bisexual men on his hands. While others will mourn and praise Koch, I shall not. I can't be that forgiving.

The Cost Of The Perfect Body

My friends over at Best Gay News have done a five year followup article about the death of Brett Mycles, bodybuilder, fitness model and adult film actor.

Mycles whose real name was Robert Sager died of a heart attack on February 25 in 2007 which his alleged use of steroids and fat burner supplements may have contributed to a family history of heart disease. Days prior to his death he had complained of an irregular heartbeat.

In January of this year an article appeared on the Internet about a survey taken by gay and bi men who would "trade off" several years of their life to have the "perfect body" for a longer period of their life span. CROWOLF wrote a commentary on the subject as did this writer taking a more personal view of the matter.

Gay and bi men have been living in the image age of being pumped up and getting those six-packed abs since the 80's, which in this writer's opinion was not just one of appearing sexy but to hide one's sexuality. After all that guy who was built like a brick shithouse couldn't possibly be gay.

Eventually that gave way to the appearance of being randy and ready for some hot sex as images in gay magazines and adult films portrayed.

When getting to that point went far beyond the gym and adding body building enhancements which had been done by athletes is when the dream of the perfect body started to become a nightmare for some and with deadly results.

Which brings us to the question are you willing to risk all no matter what for that perfect body or are you willing to settle for what you have or can achieve in the weight room alone ?

Unfortunately there are still many out there who would risk everything "to be perfect".

De Gay ..... We Ez So So Vain

While some have found this article disturbing as to what can be inferred and now somewhat studied in regards to gay and bi men when it comes to body image, I found it a bit amusing because, well, been there done that.

Back in the 70's when I first started going to gay bars, body image wasn't all that important although men with beard or mustache (I had a beard) were sought after, in fact bears (as in the photo not of today's older nor fat type) were prized trophies.

Those who were all self-obsessed with their body image the collective we called body queens. And because they wouldn't give the time of day to those who were not the same they often became the butt of jokes. Seeing them strut in, looking at themselves in the mirrors that usually were on one or more walls in the bar and ever touching and fixing their hair in the bathroom, often they ended up leaving strutting out as they came in.

In one bar which I frequented in nearby New York State in the juke box was always kept Carly Simon's song Your So Vain. After a body queen would come in and start doing his usual struting around like a male peacock for a clone of himself, someone, often me, would put a quarter in the juke and Carly would start singing. If the body queen didn't get the message many of us would start to sing along while looking and pointing at this intruder to our turf. Eventually he'd get the point and leave often yelling expletives at us.

Into the 80's body image style changed and then more and more of de gay pumped up, beards (I still kept mine) lost favor and an increase of Bic razors and shaving creme were being bought and parts of the body once unknown to razor burn were assaulted.

I myself eventually got into the pumping up to some extent but never contributed to the coffers of razor blade nor shaving creme manufacturers. As I got older I did learn a thing or two about pumping up and something I'd like to share with all of those today who are into the all important body image of "what makes de perfect gay".

There will come a time in your life when things unpump or if still pumping after a particular age you look absolutely ridiculous with an older man's body with very grizzly and drooping chest muscles. Those pecs you're so damn proud of and can bounce in tandem or singularly will become man boobies and those abs will become more the shape of a keg rather than a six pack.

While even for myself it has taken a while, long while to age with dignity and grace and yes I still have periods of "I use to look like that" moments, my maturity of mind does set in. There was a time I wore a Speedo and a man's version of a thong for a jock strap. But today I know better than to try to relive my youth because the same "built as a brick house" bod just ain't there anymore. And I'm sorry but I do laugh at those who still try after they get into their 40's and beyond.

So body queens enjoy your spectacular bods while you're young. But remember it eventually does come to an end once age and gravity takes over and you have boobies and a gut. Then try to age gracefully and look forward to those who like today's version of bear.